seriously 80s

the ten minutes before cycling class begins is an important time for hydrating oneself, stretching and warming muscles and making fun of other people in the class. last night as i was getting the legs moving and psyching myself up for a hard core sweat fest i was struck by a woman entering the cycling studio. it wasn't beauty, size or any other physical feature that was so striking, but her choice of attire that gripped the attention of at least laurie and i who were quite simply gob smacked! close your eyes and imagine this.... (it might help to have an 80s aerobic dance tune playing in the background of your mind, try Irene Cara's What a feeling) a slight-ish thai woman enters the studio with confidence, she was feeling good about the upcoming workout and feeling sexy in her cotton, knee length, pastel pink leggings. but it wasn't only the leggings that made her feel the way she did, it was her slightly darker pastel pink leotard that capped it all off for her. it was not just any leotard (still the first one i've seen in about 10 years) this leotard was cut high, way high, sitting well above the hips on each side. it was open backed, not a cross back, which meant that her soon to be sweaty, already slighty sweat stained skin colour bra strap was on show. but it didn't stop there, the moment that she chose the bike directly in front of mine was the moment that revealed all. can you believe that the cotton pastel pink, super high waisted open backed leotard was a g-string number?! OH MY GOD! and she was sitting right in front of me! imagine, me, leaning forward on my bike in a racing position, and what is it that is no more than 40 cm from my face? yep, her pastel pink leggings and g-string over the top combination! I SHIT YOU NOT! i wont go into the graphic details of butt crack sweat because it's just too bloody much to handle.... What a feeling, bein's believin', I can't have it all, now I'm dancin' for my life. Take your passion, and make it happen, Pictures come alive, you can dance right through your life.....

All gambled out

had a friends 50th on saturday night (yes, I have a friend who is 50, it is true that she could be my mum, but you need to keep in mind that I am a whole lot younger than most expats here!) it was a great night of fine wine, fancy food and casino game playing! She'd turned her (massive) apartment into a casino and conned her kids and netball team to come and work the tables for the night. There was blackjack (i sucked), poker (i lost), two up (no luck) and roulette (lost everything)... we were betting with lollies (chupa chups were big money, white rabbits on the low end)... i really wasn't very good at all and was all out by 10pm. I begged borrowed and stole what i could and then decided that being away from the tables and closer to the bar was a better option anyway. It was a super night but one that needs to be kept hush hush as gambling is completely and totally illegal - i hope that using candy gives us a loophole when we are facing time in Bangkok Hilton!

Bloody Gym

I hit the brand new Esplanade gym last night for some cycling action. The bikes were super sweet with large saddles to comfort my butt and smooth pedal rotation that meant an awesome and sweaty workout - aren't you just so excited about that? being the only farang in the class the instructor was kind enough to say everything in thai and in english - this only proceeded to embarrass and single me out, but that's ok cos everyone else was a cycling newbie and they were where i was at 4 weeks ago, nearly dead after 20 minutes. Me on the other hand was kicking some serious ass - if it were a race (and it always is in my mind) i would have left them all for dead...
had a little accident in the change rooms though. caught my leg on the corner of a little metal bench and i really started to bleed out! :O i mean, not bleed out in the ER sense where i needed some kind of transfusion or blood donation, but bleed out enough that there was a significant red puddle on the change room floor and a generous amount of gym ladies offering their concern and support. i've got a nice big band aid on it today and am milking it...